I estimate that I have given well over 1,000 campus talks. Beyond a shadow of a doubt, there is one that has been most quoted, most requested, and most re-printed. I've even walked into campus centers and seen some version of it laying on a handout table. It all started one spring in our "Dead Day Program Planning" meeting. They asked me to come up with a talk that would draw Christians and Non-Christians alike to our first worship event of the fall. Have a title that is "promoteable". Without much discussion and thinking, the group said, "Do something on guy/girl relationships.". I thought we were talking about a one time talk. It became an annual End of the Year talk. Through the years, I was asked to do it as an outreach event on different campuses. After a few years, I quit doing it. Then, someone called and asked me to do it at a Teen Drug Conference. And it came back again. I wish I could say it was explaining the book of Revelation or the plan of salvation or How to Know God's Will. But...no!
Here is the basic outline and you are welcome to take it, improve on it, and use it, if it will ever be of help to you.
7 Red Flags in a Guy/Girl Relationship
1. The two of you are all consumed in each other and all other relationships are neglected.
2. Major differences are ignored or not talked about such as future goals, religious differences and life priorities and goals.
3. There is a drastic change in the sense of responsibility one or both partners has to other commitments. A healthy relationship makes you a better you.
4. Friends and/or family who know you best and love you most disapprove of the relationship.
5. Conflict is avoided at all costs. Healthy relationships learn to express and deal with disagreements.
6. One partner uses the other or demonstrates a lack of respect for the other. This can involve emotional or physical abuse.
7. Physical contact or sexual involvement becomes the central activity or the main part of the relationship. This can be entrapping or make it difficult to know your real feelings.
Some of What the Bible Says About Sex, Relationships, and Marriage:
God is the author of sexuality - Genesis 2:24-25
Sex outside of marriage is harmful. - I Thessalonians 4:3
Genuine love wants what is best for the other person. - I Corinthians 13:4-6
Marriage is a total commitment to one person. - Ephesians 5:28-31
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